Have I hit rock bottom yet?

19 09 2008

So yesterday I was suffering from a cold, horrible sinus headaches, and above all I HAD to go to work. Which is fine I wasn’t completley out of it and it’s not like I had tons of vacation or sick leave anyways. I go to work on a mission to accomplish as much as I possibly can because I knew I was going to be really lame today and not want to do anything.

I push everyone to work hard, get a lot done, and overall just make the boss happy. Things were going smooth. I mean really smooth. Smooth enough for Bryson to say “Things are going too smooth something’s going to happen to fuck it all up.” I swear he jinxed it all.

Only had a couple hours till quiting time. Things were going great. I can’t tell you exactly what happened, but hopefully enough I can give you a good enough idea.

On of the my systems needed to be reworked, meaning it needed corrosion control and new paint job. So were taking it down and prepping it for some good maintenance loving. Bryson and I were sitting up top, about a good 20 feet or so above ground. Richard, Quincy, Stanley down below – still 4 feet above the ground – manning things from below. Now mind you I am the leading person for this system so I was watching out for everyone’s safety. I didn’t want anyone to get hurt under my watch – see where I am going with this yet?

Got all the bolts out, secured to the cables and ready to be lowered. Except one problem it wasn’t budging. I stood up a little to look over all the bolt sections to make sure we didn’t leave one in. The moment I did that – BOOM !!!!!! – it falls. At that moment I jumped back, but my right foot was still hanging over and the nice 600-700 lbs ‘object’ fell on my foot that was laying side ways. And continued it’s way down till the cables tightened. But sadly, in that process my coworker Stanley got hurt too. He was standing right below me. He tried to hold it up, but that was a fruitless endeavor, the moment he could jump off he did.

I cried. I hate crying at work.

I work with a bunch of guys….. I was honestly waiting for one of them to jokingly say “Suck it up Danni.” Graciously they didn’t. They made sure I was ok. Well in some sense. They made sure no bleeding. Continued to lower the ‘object’ because I wanted them too. If it stayed int he position it was bound to injure someone else. I couldn’t have that on my conscious.

I attempted to calm myself down, and reassess my situation. !. My foot may be broken. 2. How the hell am I supposed to climb down 20 some odd feet? 3. Damn Bryson jinxed this. 4. How am I supposed to pick up my son? 5. Thank god tomorrow is Friday.

Priorities aren’t always there. lol.

Nonetheless, a scissors lift was called to my rescue. I was carried down and the ambulance was called for me.

Now the EMTs. I have a bone to pick with them. Now thankfully I wasn’t dying, but if I was I’d be dead by the time they figured out how to work the stupid fucking gurney. It took them what felt like forever to figure how to get it into the back of the ambulance. They took forever figuring how to place my splint. The whole ride about 10 mins to figure how to take my blood pressure with an eletronic one and then manually the guy was hopeless. Thank god it was only my leg.

When I finally got to the emergency room I was a little more calm. I was doing my best to keep myself in a good safe area of my mind. I mean come on I was cracking jokes so no one feels depressed about the situation. I had white paint on my face because I was crying face down. When I sat up Quincy thought I got wake by said ‘object’ in the face, I wasn’t, but I said it was camoflauge. While on the gurney I told bryson, “Fail.”

If others are stressed and worried, it really heightens my anxiety and worries too.

I sat in the ER, trying to laugh, trying to be calm, just ….. trying. The nurse was kind of helful she was funny-ish. She stabbed me in the butt with a pain killer so that she can take my shoe off without me screaming bloody murder. The butt stab I have to say hurt more than my foot. It burned more like it. I got some x-rays and my first cat scan ever. Then given another stab in the arm, tetanus shot. I couldn’t remember the last time I got one. Damn nurse I swear she just wanted to keep stabbing me.

The pain killer, which I think she said was depheral(?) – was really strong and apparently I am really really REALLY sensitive to it. I was out of it and completely loopy. Minus 2 coworkers they call came down to see Stanley and I, Stanley was in the room across from me.

So anyways going off topic, sort of, the out come. I should count my blessings because I am damn lucky I didn’t break anything. Better yet didn’t fracture anything. As it stands I have some internal swelling that is keeping me from feelings my toes. It still hurts like a mofo, but I still have my foot and when things are all healed up it’ll still work. 🙂

Stanley is well took, he has some back and shoulders pains and will be followed up with a doctor appointment sooner or later. I didn’t want to wait till Monday so I made a follow up this afternoon with Dr. P. I might just have to be out for a couple days.

Here’s an even shittier part, I just found out about 20 mins ago that all that work, the injury of two workers, this was all done for nothing. We were just told that the sand blaster guys found out their equipment doens’t work today. WTF!?? They knew we were going to be doing this today, they should have started checking their equipment last week.

SOOOOO when I go back to work, we have to put it all back together. How FUBAR is that?!?!

Here’s another crappy thing to add to my list of this month.  I’m trying to figure out what I did to have karma come back at me like this.

A Crappy September

15 09 2008

One would think that since I left August with a wonderful note that the greatness would carry over into September. Where in fact it just died on the 1st.

Yea this month really hasn’t been that great. I don’t blog or right much when I’m in a crappy depressing mood. Well I do but NEVER nearly as much when I’m happy.

It feels like summer just started all over again. It’s 9:40pm and I am sweating my ass off as I sit here. With a fan. Pointed right at me. 1 foot away. WTF.

But it’s more than that.

Bad news keeps rolling away, most I’m not entirely at liberty to talk about, and some I just don’t want to mention.

Somehow our money just evaporated into thin air. And we are here liquidating our crap to make up for the evaporated money.

The people I traded my car in to for the 4runner were supposed to take care of the loan. Guess what they didn’t. It’s been over a month. I had a collections agency call me last friday for my lack of payment and I was almost up shit creek if it wasn’t for Preston going down there today and ripping them a new one.

They still haven’t paid for like $400 of it. But it’s better tha nothing. I hate those guys. Once this resolved we are writing into the Better Business Burea to complain. This little stunt they did really did put a bad note on my credit history/score.

I know I checked.

Things seriously have been rolling down hill.

……… I picked up smoking again………

I hate it, but right now I don’t know a better way to relieve the stress.

The other night Preston and I sat outside. Kind of had to I was smoking a cigarette and he asked me how I felt. I wanted to cry, but couldn’t. I told him with everything that’s happening I just want to cry, fall into a coma, and wake up when all of this has been resolved.

He laughed. Then he went on to talk about buying a motorcycle some 250 something. Guys really suck at making you feel better. I was better off just talking to the dog.

Oh yea I bought a dog. The only great thing about this month

I’m going to go. I have to go through our bills now. We have a total of $70 to live off of till Friday. Most people will say that’s more than plenty. But really our case…… it’s not.